If the Old Man stops eating Porridge
… what does that mean?
All of my life my dad ate oatmeal.
On the weekends, my father made breakfasts for the family:
Saturday mornings it was eggs, bacon and toast.
Sunday mornings, it was oatmeal.
On Saturday mornings, as a teenager, I remember waking up to my father’s angry voice. It is 10am, you are sleeping your life away!
Sunday, Oatmeal.
One Sunday I was so disgusted by the oatmeal, I could not figure out a way to finish my bowl. I had no choice but to eat it all.We were going to church that morning, so the time limit was there. Sundays were fundays, my fun friend days.
Church meant a whole world of party.
And who knew where we would end up? Sundays were free ask days: last minute Sunday lunch invites! Wahoo. And if I went to church with different friend’s families, that meant different parties: pool tables, big spaces, separate spaces.
There was something just terrific about knowing your parents were being entertained by the same family that you were spending time with.
I love visiting other families. That is what I do. My husband thinks I am strange for going to visit people. Over Thanksgiving, I went to the cottage, and then to Montreal and then Saratoga and finally home.
I was only gone for one week.
That is what I would like to do. One week off every three weeks.
Week #1 One week of work
Week #2 One week of events & celebrations, rituals
Week #3 One week of travel family & visits
Week #4 One week of Rest to repair; eat healthy; exercise, retreat
Recover stay home, hibernate, nest, clean
This is the way of the moon
Did the fear Imperfection shut you down? Are you really a hermit?
New Moon – Dream set intentions, make goals, Clarity
Full Moon – let it all go
I am wondering what to do with myself next? Is something controlling me, stopping me from traveling, yet holding me close whenever it needs me.
This constant push and pull.
My mother has told me only a few of her observations and fears. One is that my father has stopped eating oatmeal. For some reason, it is a big deal for her. He has forgotten how to make coffee too. He took my toast out of the toaster; I didn’t say anything. I think this is what I am learning. Not to say anything. When someone acts weird.
Yesterday I forgot to collect Faisal’s dry cleaning. I went to the coffee shop, JavaGirl, for a sandwich and a mug of tea. She should have teapots. I will ask her for a teapot. I would like to go now, but it is too late. I am alone tonight. After JavaGirl I went to Trader Joes, I thought, should I pick up Laundry first? Or shop first?
I figured it was easier to have the laundry in my purse while shopping, rather than the plastic-covered laundry. One things at a time? I went to Trader’s. I bought meat for the week. It cost $169 for Turkey meat, ground beef burgers, 5lb chicken (making soup from the bones), chicken thighs, two steaks and a porkloin (this lasts for so long?).
When I went to the dry cleaner I picked up two shirts, and I dropped off two (she did not give the chit).
There was another woman who interrupted me and the old lady during my sales interaction,I should do Faisal’s shirts?
Artist Alice, did you do Mark’s shirts? I really love them: Mark and Alice. They told me the other day that they were sad saying good bye to their parents. When is Family day with Joy?Wish I were there to see Janet. When is the party on Saturday?32143214Are Asians so transactional? Like little ants. In that time I forgot to take Faisal’s stuff. I had three bags of my own. I wonder if I should get a bundle buggy I do like to shop at the Markets.
German markets. Still torn between going to Europe and being with Faisal. BZ told me to hold on to Europe – Christmas Markets, ever since England.
Work Celebrate Rest Nest
My pattern seems to be work myself into a frenzy, Pass out Repeat
I need to integrate the recovery: food, sleep, medicine, air, energy, movement.
What are the things that make you most happy? What needs to be happening in each area?Manipulate and control don’t want to manipulate and control any more.
My older brother says that my mother has bred herself into absolute Master.
You were once my master, and I your disciple. Now I am your master. [Master kills disciple.]
It is unbelievable, they are starting to act as they become actors. Instead of being in themselves. Every great actor is himself in every role. Or are the roles created for the great actor? All the world is a stage, and we are it’s actors. Write six paragraphs explaining what this means to you in your life? She made him completely dependent on her.